Jenna's Blog

El Fin

2010-03-21T17:33:00.003-04:00

This will be my last entry. Both Scott and I are home, safe and sound and I no longer have a reason to continue with this blog.

There were several purposes for this blog. The first and foremost was to share my experiences with family and friends. I also wanted to let people know about the military and what we experience in a combat zone. As an Air Force Officer who is not a pilot, it is very unlikely that I will again be in a situation where I am the war fighter. I am usually in a support role; my job ensures that planes get off the ground so they can fight the enemy. But this time, I was the one directly fighting the enemy. To the pleasure of my parents, that probably won't happen again.

At times I have felt selfish. I did not hold back my feelings and I know that many of my entries have upset the people I love. If it is any consolation, I have used the blog as an outlet for my stress, frustration and insomnia.

Re-integration

2010-03-17T11:07:00.002-04:00

The deployment is not over until you are home and once again "normal," if this nebulous "normal" state can ever be achieved. Because the fact is, you've been in a war zone and you have changed.

I'll speak in generalities. Most suicides in a deployed environment occur in the last month. Many service members, both male and female, are not ready to resume their responsibilities at home. You see, during a deployment every thing is taken care of for you so you can focus 100% on your job. There's no laundry, no cooking, no cleaning, no crying children and no nagging spouse. Of course there are different stressors in a war zone, but I've heard many people say that is what they prefer.

There's also the fact that once you are home, you can feel very detached from what's really important. There's two wars going on, but here I am in Indiana, totally useless. There are other soldiers out there fighting and I need to be with them doing my part. I have already started to feel this way. As I am leaving the area, I see a lot of Marines and Soldiers coming in. They all look so young and I only know 20% of what they are about to experience. I think this upcoming summer will be the most violent in the war thus far and they are going to be there in the thick of it. My heart breaks for them and the heavy burden they carry on their shoulders. Every time I hear of a US service member dying, I become sick.

Goodbye FOB Finley Shields

2010-03-14T00:54:00.000-05:00

Leg one of five complete!

Risk Adverse Part II

2010-03-14T00:26:00.002-05:00

If you were to look at a picture of a soldier during WWII and a soldier in either Iraq or Afghanistan today, you would notice many differences. Probably the most noticeable different is the amount of gear that today's soldier carries. We are always trying to improve the way we fight and our body armor has saved many lives.

With that said, we shouldn't be wearing body armor in Afghanistan. We shouldn't be driving around in MRAPs either. These are conventional solutions to an unconventional war. We are treating the symptoms rather than the cause.

Let's start with the decision to upgrade from Hummves to MRAPs. The enemy was building bigger and bigger bombs that were capable of catastrophically destroying a Hummve. So now it is mandatory that we use MRAPs. And guess what? Now the enemy can build bigger bombs that will destroy an MRAP. What's after the MRAP? How big are the next generation of vehicles? MRAPs are big enough--they get stuck on unpaved roads, can't fit through the narrow roads, they are high and bulky and are extremely noisy. Whatever adaptions we make to our vehicles, body armor, etc the enemy will still find a way to kill us. Instead of focusing our efforts on protecting ourselves and adapting to the enemy's operations, maybe we should focus more on rooting out the enemy.

In COIN 101, you are taught that the population is the center of gravity. It's no longer a factory or military base. We are trying to win over the population and make them believe in our cause instead of the insurgent's. All of this is being done, of course, in concert with the local government. The local government and its ideals is what the people are fighting for. So we are trying to connect with the population, person to person. You can almost think about it like a politician trying to win an election. He needs to be a gregarious, sympathetic and passionate leader. Now tell me how this politician would do if he is from a different country than the one he is campaigning in. He wears different clothes. He speaks a different language. He has a different culture and a different religion. He can't campaign forever, he has to go home and visit his family. He would have to work ten times as hard as his opponent in order to be successful.

So when we drive around in our big, out of place vehicles, wear our bulky body armor that makes us look like monsters and spend most of our time on eye sore military installations, I think we are helping the insurgents by isolating ourselves from the population. This is our conventional mindset. This is why industrialized nations lose COIN wars. This is why Afghanistan is the graveyard of empires.

Risk Adverse Part I

2010-03-12T05:07:00.005-05:00

It's the post you've all been waiting for! Probably not, but it's the post I've been waiting to get off my chest.

The military minimizes risk in every aspect of life. Now, this may sound like a good thing. But not when the restriction is illogical or the wrong way to fight a war.

I don't know how it happened, but the military is obsessed with safety. We are required to wear reflective belts in daylight. We are prohibited from using headphones on a running track. I could go on and on. In the military, there are no accidents. Only Commanders who have failed at leadership. Commanders are so afraid that an accident will occur under their watch which will lead to their termination, that they create absurd "safety" rules. What they really are doing is treating us like children. This home station attitude clearly carries over into the deployed environment. And in Risk Adverse Part II, I will explain why being "safe" in a COIN environment is actually more dangerous.

Engineer Arif

2010-03-11T07:46:00.003-05:00

I'm still in Afghanistan. I'll be here for the next several days and since I have no official work, I'm taking this time to reflect on my tour. I've promised an entry on Engineer Arif, so here goes...

Engineer Arif is the Nangarhar Province Director of Public Works. He is one of the few, if not the only, Line Directors who is not former mujaheddin. I like to think that most of his contemporaries have fled the country. But Engineer Arif remains. He is a well educated, smart man and could most definitely teach me a thing or two about engineering. He knows this province like the back of his hand and the PRT has been implementing his strategic road plan for the past three years. He is the only Line Director who visits his project sites and he does it on a frequent basis. He is a capable man who has relocated mosques, graveyards and hundreds of houses for road construction. He is able to connect to the populace and explain the importance of roads. He understands that roads are not only important for the economy and governance, but that they are also political. I think Engineer Arif understands the COIN fight better than most US military officers. Road projects are multi-million dollar projects and it seems like every Afghan Government Official tries to get their hands in that cookie jar. But not Engineer Arif. He is honest, talented, hard working and intelligent. He is the kind of person who shows me there is hope for Afghanistan. Hopefully there are hundreds and thousands more just like him. It has been an honor to work closely with him for the past nine months and I wish I had spent more time with him. Engineer Arif for President!

Last Mission!

2010-03-06T08:12:00.002-05:00

I just came back from my last mission! What a great feeling!! I know I'm not done yet, but I keep on checking items off my list. I'm one step closer to going home. Only three percent left!

Scott has already left and will probably be home before I leave Afghanistan. I wish I could be with him, but at least we will be able to take our two weeks off together when I get back.

I might as well take this opportunity to list all the things I will NOT miss:
- Not being able to walk around barefoot. Ever.
- Low flying helicopters circling at 2am.
- Lobster on Friday. Every Friday! I know I may sound crazy, but too much of a good
thing can be a bad thing.
- The feeling that after I've taken a shower, I'm filthier than when I started.
- Incessant Afghans. They are very persistent, even on Fridays.
- Stone Age internet connection.
- When it rains, it smells like shit.
- All the stares I receive because I'm an American and a woman.
- My lumpy mattress.
- The Army. I want to go back to Air Force land where things make sense.
- All the BS!!

And the things I will miss:
- I never have to spend money.
- The food is half decent and I never have to cook.
- I've never had my underwear stolen and I never have to do my laundry.
- $1 DVDs.
- Afghan food. It's pretty tasty, especially goat and sugar coated almonds (aka crack).
- The beautiful weather in the fall, spring and winter (when it doesn't rain, see above).
- The Army. I think I'm more green than blue right now.

Operation Notebook Part II

2010-03-01T08:04:00.002-05:00

Just recently we did another mission to a school and I got to hand out more school supplies. I think every school in Afghanistan is in need. It was a really nice mission and after the engineering portion, I was able to sit in on a female engagement team to interact with women and children. It was a beautiful community. I instantly received good vibes from the village. I could tell there was a lot of love and respect. One women was very pregnant with her seventh child. Even though she had the wrinkles of a 60 year old, she had this amazing pregnancy glow about her.

When we arrived at the school, there were children every where!

The school had several buildings and more under construction. There was just not enough room for all the children.

The teachers and students collect the boxes of school supplies...

And take them back to the school.

The cutest baby!

Talking with the women and children.

And Then There Were Two

2010-02-27T03:42:00.005-05:00

It's hard to believe I'm going home soon. At times it feels like a year and at other times it feels like I just arrived. The team is starting to filter out and we are down an engineer.

I wanted to share a couple of pictures from a recent awards ceremony where all three engineers on the team (including myself) earned an Army Combat Action Badge (CAB). Strangely enough, the criteria for Air Force equivalent is much more strict. I will definately not receive one but my guys have been submitted for the award. They should also receive Purple Hearts for the incident, but alas the Air Force is dragging its feet once again. It's shameful that the Army Purple Hearts for same incident have already been presented. I thought a Purple Heart was a Purple Heart, no matter what branch of the service.

The ceremony was strange in the fact that people were congratulating me for getting blown up. Who in their right mind wants to get blown up or shot at? I don't want a "congratulations," but at the same I don't want sympathy. In the military we train and prepare ourselves for combat. So getting blown up or shot at is what we want to do, what we hope to do, what we should do. And of course fight back! It shows that we are mentally and physically tough to endure such an event and prevail. We are brave and courageous in perilous situations. And maybe that does warrant a congratulations. But sitting in an MRAP--attracting baby IEDs--totally helpless--is not very courageous.

Accepting the Army CAB from the Commander

Combat Engineers!

Operation Notebook Part I

2010-02-23T10:17:00.003-05:00

Operation Notebook. Not the most creative name, but it will have to do. I've received several packages of school supplies in the mail over the past couple of weeks. This past weekend I was able to go through them and sort all the supplies and come up with a plan for delivery. A big thank you for every one who either chipped in some money or organized a school supplies drive at their school. I was able to divide the supplies evenly among five different schools throughout Nangarhar Province.

The first delivery was two days ago in one of my favorite villages in Dari Noor. The PRT has a very good relationship with the village and I always feel very safe whenever I go there. However, I was unable to be on the mission, so one of the other engineers delivered the supplies to the headmaster. I was told that when the boxes of school supplies were taken out of the MRAPs, a huge crowd gathered to see what was in the boxes. The headmaster was very grateful and I think you can see the huge smile on his face. His school had zero supplies and books, but now they at least have paper, pens, pencils, chalk, rulers and notebooks.

I hope to have all the school supplies delivered before I leave. And the good news is, I just received word that I have seven more boxes waiting for me at the post office!

The C Word

2010-02-16T06:08:00.003-05:00

Convoy. Two years ago, it was my dirtiest of dirty words. I didn't like the sound of it. I didn't want to hear it. And I certainly didn't use it. Because whenever US troops were being killed, it was on a convoy. A convoy was just disaster in the making and I didn't want any part of it.

In lieu of tasking. A dirty phrase. I knew eventually I would deploy and I wanted to. I was an oddity in the military-in almost five years and never deployed. Hanging out in Korea doesn't count for shit. I was crossing my fingers for a cushy deployment-Diego Garcia in the Indian Ocean or Manas Air Base in Kyrgyzstan where you can go on weekend hiking trips. The worst case scenario was an in lieu of tasking, now called a joint expeditionary tasking (JET) where I would take the place of an Army bubba because the Army is that strapped for people. Most of these JET positions involve that nasty C word and going "outside the wire," or outside the base.

So on 23 December 2008, my world turned upside down. My unit deployment manager (UDM) came into my office and said she had a deployment for me. I was both excited and nervous. Then she said it was a long one. What? Longer than six months? How is this possible? I just came off of a short tour (Korea) and should not be eligible for a 365-day deployment. Oh, it's just a 270-day deployment with three months of pre-deployment training that doesn't count towards the actual deployment time. That makes me feel better. Oh, and you say I'm with the Army on an Afghanistan PRT and I'll be going on that C word two to three times a week? Fantastic.

Adapt and overcome. I've been put outside my comfort zone so many times that now it's the only place I can exist.

Now I feel at home with the Army. Don't let that fool you into thinking that I actually like the Army. But, the Army is pretty simple. If you're not a Sergeant, you're pretty worthless and your opinion counts for a whole lot of nothing. Officers are God-like and placed on a pedestal (even the really dumb Lieutenants). If someone gets in trouble, you drop them for push-ups rather than dropping paperwork. But there are a lot of draw backs. The Air Force always talks about diversity and learning from other people. I've learned a lot in this joint deployment, just by asking questions of my Army brothers and sisters and listening to their answers. But they did not ask me one question about how the Air Force operates. The Army only operates one way-the right way, and their personnel cannot see it any different. Completely incapable of thinking outside the box. And that irks me. We are fighting a counter-insurgency (COIN) war and people throw around the COIN phrase more than Megan Fox around here. But when the Army bubbas have been told to operate a certain way and this is the only way they know, they cannot adapt and overcome the COIN environment. Because all their training is the exact opposite of what they should be doing in a COIN environment. You should live outside the wire, eat your meals with locals in their house and take off your ridiculous body armor that makes you look like a monster. Okay, I'm going off on a completely different tangent. I'll save that piece for another entry entitled "Risk Adverse."

What I'm trying to say is the Army is still pretty messed up, but I feel at home with them. Two years ago I was petrified of a JET tasking and now I don't want to reintegrate with the Air Force. But I don't want to be with the Army. A catch-22 in classic military fashion.

The Air Force thinks I'm extraordinary. Here I am, running missions outside the wire, living at a small forward operating base and directly contributing to the war effort. I'm a hero in Big Air Force eyes. But it's ridiculous!! The Army does this stuff all day, every day. I'll ensure you that there's nothing special about me, but whenever the Air Force big wigs come to visit, they like to stoke our egos and tell us how awesome we are. Yeah, I'm really brave for going outside the wire in a big vehicle that was specifically designed to be IED and small arms fire proof.

Two years after I thought convoy was a dirty word, I couldn't image myself at Diego Garcia or Manas. What would I write on my Officer Performance Report? That I supported the infrastructure so the real war fighters could make it to the fight? I'm one of those real war fighters now and I'm not looking back.

Over the past 11 months I've acquired an Army PT uniform. When I return to Mildenhall, I plan on wearing it to my first day of squadron PT. But I have a feeling that no one will get it.

Four Hundred Pounds Lighter

2010-02-15T05:06:00.002-05:00

It's the beginning of the end. My replacement is here and the rest of the new team will be here soon. I've mailed home 200 pounds of stuff and turned in 200 pounds of gear that I was issued almost a year ago. Even though most of that gear and stuff was hiding under my bed for the past several months, I can really feel the weight started to come off my shoulders. It feels really good.

It seems like this last month is the hardest. I wish I could say I came back off of R&R ready to finish out strong, but my rejuvenation lasted only 48 hours. This deployment has been very wearing and I feel a lot older (and have more gray hairs to prove it). I just have to stay focused until the very end, when I can kiss the UK soil and my sweet Scott.

Contractor Seminar

2010-02-04T00:33:00.003-05:00

I'm still catching up on the blog and posting some events that happened before I went on R&R. Below are some pictures from a contractor seminar the PRT hosted a couple days before I left. We invited as many contractors as we could find and even received a lot of invitation requests from companies we didn't know. In the end, over 300 people showed up and travelers from all corners of Afghanistan showed up.

The PRT Afghan engineers instructed the contractors on basic construction techniques and materials, quality assurance programs and communication skills. It was a great event. Our Director of Public Works, Engineer Arif, gave a great motivational speech. I can't say enough about him, but I think I'll save it for another time.

After the seminar, we provided a lunch for all the attendees and I felt like a minor celebrity as many people wanted to take my picture. Hopefully it doesn't end up on some Taliban website.

Engineer Arif talks to the group.

Enjoying lunch

The only two female attendees. :)

Nine Hundred Twenty-One Hours

2010-01-29T05:17:00.000-05:00

But who's counting?

Congratulations

2010-01-26T07:52:00.002-05:00

Congratulations Lt Col M. Joy Mann, PRT Nangarhar Commander, on your selection to Colonel.

Never have I know a commander who understands better the quote, "Put the mission first and the people always." You comprehend how important our mission is to the people of Afghanistan and the American people. How important our job is in extinguishing the center of world terrorism and you motivate us everyday to go out and be the best Airmen and Soldiers we can be for this important cause. You also understand risk vs. reward; how we put our lives on the line every day but it's worth it because our job is so important.

You take care of your people and they take care of you. You go above and beyond to see that your people have everything that they need personally and professionally. And that is precisely why I joined the military--a brotherhood/sisterhood in arms where the people care about each other and take care of each other just because they wear the same thing to work every day.

I have never been in a more cohesive unit with such high morale. And that is a tribute to your leadership. I am so proud to serve with an officer of your caliber and I know the Air Force has made the right decision by promoting you to a position where you can exert your positive influence.

Back in the U.S.S.R.

2010-01-20T21:14:00.009-05:00

Well, not really but it is the title of one of my favorite Beattles songs and I am back in Afghanistan, which is probably comparible to life in the U.S.S.R.

The trip back was brutal. Three red eye flights, three nights in a row. I didn't see a bed for three nights. I returned to the FOB and slept for 19 and a half hours straight! It was awesome! And now there are only seven weeks left until my projected departure date from Craplakistan.

Going back to R&R...Scott and I didn't take many pictures, which is a shame. But I am determined to share with you the pictures that we did take (all in airports, by the way).

This picture is from our trip to the UK. We stopped in Bahrain, which is one of the wealthiest countries in the Middle East. And apparently, they like Christmas commercialism just as much as we do.
These next set of pictures are in the Heathrow Airport as we are getting ready to return. Our last pint of English ale for the next two months!

Wait for it....!!!

And this picture was taken in Kuwait as we wait for our flight. That was an eventful leg of our journey...we flew in a C-17 that was full of 105mm rockets. If anything went wrong with the flight, at least it would have been a painless death.

Love in a War Zone

2010-01-15T21:38:00.003-05:00

Love in a war zone unlike love anywhere else. It is simple. Unrefined.

There are no quarrels, because death is imminent. Do you really want your last conversation to be in anger?

If there is a disagreement, it is resolved at the fastest of pace because death is imminent.

Every conversation starts, ends and is heavily peppered with "I love you."

And that's all there is really, conversations.

You look forward to your next encounter and hold on tightly to your sweet memories.

And that's all they are really, memories.

I think we could learn a lot from love in a war zone. But at the same time, it is a false love. It is a simple love.

It requires no sacrifice, no patience. No solutions to your problems, only that they will be dealt with later.

No compromise.

No communication.

Your love is simply put on hold.

R&R

2010-01-08T03:30:00.002-05:00

Scott and I only have a couple more days left for our R&R break. I'm just about ready to call the experience a success, as I do not have shrapnel or holes in my body like the other engineers on the team. Yes, the PRT was hit with a landmine of some sort about a week ago while on an engineering mission and some of the team members got roughed up a bit. But I'm told everyone is okay. They are lucky, because children and police were killed during the attack.

Since I'm admitting this, I might as go ahead and explain how I was on a convoy that was hit with an IED. It happened in early November and we were on the way back from the mission when one of our trucks took a baby IED. I wasn't in the truck...I was very far away but I heard the explosion and saw the cloud of smoke. I think my heart literally stopped and the next two minutes were the scariest of my life. I kept on waiting for the secondary attack, but thankfully it never came. Luckily, everyone was okay, no injuries, and we only had to replace the tire on the truck.

So now everyone will worry about me as I head back to Afghanistan for the final two months. But please don't! I know that Scott and I are being protected. Too many uncanny things have happened for me not to know that we will be okay.

Overall, R&R has been fun and relaxing. I would be lying if I said it was easy to come home. At times I wanted to go back to Afghanistan so I could resume a routine...something stabilizing. I think it will be easier when I'm home for good and have to go to work!

The weather is incredibility cold and snowy, especially since I'm used to 70 degree weather. But Scott and I managed to get out of the house to visit Norwich and Nottingham, both cities having 11th century castles. We also ate out a lot and I had forgotten what real food tastes like (and alcohol!).

So the next time I'll be back in Afghanistan, looking forward to receiving all those school supplies!

HOME!!

2009-12-31T14:12:00.003-05:00

If home is where the heart is, then home is with Scott.

Scott and I made it home! The travel was absolutely miserable but we made it home in record time. We landed in London at 6am and made it Cambridge around noon. When we arrived to our home, we discovered that our neighbors let one of their friends stay in our house during the holiday season. It was pretty creepy to see sheets on our bed that were not ours, hairs in the shower that did not belong to us and food in the refrigerator that we did not leave. I was (am) pretty traumatized, but Scott was (is!) amazing and handled the situation.

After that was taken care of, we went into town. But first we had to find some civilian clothes to wear and that was quite a task. We had a hard time remembering where everything in the house is located, including coats and gloves. It was frustrating. Once we got into town, we wandered around and not much has changed. We spent a lot of money on alcohol and now we are settling in for a movie, so I gotta go.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year!

New Kind of Care Package

2009-12-18T05:54:00.005-05:00

I've officially given up on counter insurgency. Now I'm all about helping people. And I've been meaning to post an entry on the school situation for a long time, so here it is.

It seems like in Afghanistan when you go to school, you either have a roof over your head or school books. You can't have both. The conditions that these children attend school are amazing. They walk several miles, their teachers do not receive a salary, they have no books, no pens, no paper. The girls risk their lives to attend school and if the school does not have a privacy wall, parents will not send their girls to school after a certain age. The classrooms are bare except for a blackboard and some chalk. I've gone out to two schools that the PRT has completed to inspect the buildings for warranty items. I have been able to see the children in their classroom and it breaks my heart.

I have received several boxes of school supplies from my Aunt Kathy and Uncle Mike. But I would like to but the request out for more supplies. Instead of sending me a care package, use that money and send these kids some paper and pens!! Here's a list of things they could use:

- Chalk (white and colored)
- Blackboard erasers
- Maps (World maps, maps of Afghanistan or the region)
- Paper
- Pens
- Pencils
- Notebooks
- Folders
- Crayons

It's been a while since I was in school, so anything else you can think of would be great. Nothing in Afghanistan goes to waste.

And I want to share some pictures. The first set is of an open air girls school in Jalalabad City.

These next set of pictures are from a site visit earlier this week. It was an all girls school, grades 1-9. There were many younger girls, about 30-35 in each class. But as we toured the different classrooms, higher the grade, the less girls that were present. It was interesting because all the teachers were male. Yet I could see how much they cared about the girls' education and how they thought it was important.

Foward Operating Base Finley-Shields

2009-12-09T05:07:00.007-05:00

A long time ago I received a comment on the blog asking me to post pictures of the FOB. This soldier was friends with one of the soldiers who the FOB is named after.

It's taken me long enough, but here are the pictures. We are very lucky as we have one of the nicest, if not the nicest FOBs in Afghanistan. This FOB used to be a R&R destination for Russian soldiers in the 1980s and there are a lot of permanent structures, which is a luxury in a war zone. When the US "discovered" this area, they spent many years and dollars renovating the buildings and turning it into a base. There is also a lot of green, which is again rare for Afghanistan.

The main entrance to the FOB.

For a while we had some puppies, but they have since found a better home.

The gym, where I spend a considerable amount of time working off the unlimited supply of Baskin Robbins ice cream.

A nice porch where you can take an hour of your day and play some ping pong.

The CE lair. If it looks messy, that's because we're busy!

The Hotel. Need I say more?

I posted this picture in an earlier blog, but I did not mention that this is the garden.

Top Dawg

2009-12-09T05:01:00.004-05:00

A couple weeks ago the top enlisted Airmen came to visit the PRT. He is called the Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Force (CMSAF) and his last name is Roy. He is a civil engineer by trade--a dirt boy (heavy horizontal) to be exact. And we took him on a QA/QC mission. It's the first time the CMSAF has ever been on a combat mission outside the wire. Sergeant Newland, the engineering non-commissioned officer in charge took him on the mission. Below are some pictures and a link to a news story.

http://www.bagram.afcent.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123179911

Jalalabad vs. Gardez

2009-12-09T04:43:00.003-05:00

Jalalabad may be brutally hot in the summertime, but it is quickly making up for the heat now that it's December.

So anyway, back to Jalalabad vs. Gardez. I think the pictures are pretty self explanatory...

vs.

I get cold just looking at Scott's pictures!

Questions to Ponder

2009-12-01T08:51:00.002-05:00

1. If the 9/11 attacks were somehow prevented, would the United States still have invaded Afghanistan?

2. What is more of a threat to the security of the United States: being owned financially by China or terrorists in Pakistan?

Stop Violence Against Women

2009-11-27T07:07:00.003-05:00

It's been a while since my last post and I have a lot of things to say and pictures to share. The next several posts will be out of order, but I'll get everything down.

First off, a couple days ago I went to a Stop Violence Against Women Conference. It was somewhat comical since violence against women will never stop in Afghanistan, but it was my first time to observe a gathering of Afghan women in public. When the PRT arrived at the conference site, there were around 70 women already seated. They weren't wearing burqas, but they were wearing headscarves that covered everything but their eyes since men were present. When we walked into the building, 70 pairs of eyes immediately focused on us. It was really eerie looking back at all these sets of eyes. The women were also very skittish, like antelopes that could be dinner for a hungry lion at any moment. They each carried a burqua as just another accessory like their cell phone or purse. When the conference was over and it was time to leave, they put on their burqas (heaven forbid someone should see their eyes) and left the compound.
As far as Thanksgiving and the holiday season, I think it's best to pretend like these events don't exist. It makes the pain of being stuck in Afghanistan, away from loved ones much easier. I do have a bright spot: it looks like Scott and I will be able to take leave together and go back to the UK in January. It won't be a long time at home, but a day there is a day that I'm not here.

Deh Bala

2009-11-08T04:35:00.001-05:00

Not long ago we went on an engineering mission to check up on some of our road projects. This is one of my favorite missions because we can check on three important roads at once and the scenery is beautiful. I also got to check-up on the village where our MRAPs were stuck. I recognized one little boy and gave him a life saver, even though he wanted a pen. Go sugar! We ran into a little trouble on the way back with a flat tire, so we're all convinced that this particular mission is cursed.

Our convoy commander, Mac, gives the crew a convoy brief at the Cinema before we roll out.

The scenery in southern Deh Bala is so beautiful because the Spin Ghars (White Mountains) make up half of the district. They have a history of insurgent activity.

Torkham Gate

2009-11-08T04:27:00.004-05:00

A couple weeks ago, the new PRT Commander visited us for his orientation. He's a great guy and we showed him some of our high visibility projects. We went to Torkham Gate, on the border with Pakistan. That place is a lot of fun. We even were hosted by an Afghan Border Police (ABP) Colonel who showed us around the ABP compound, which is built into the side of a mountain. He was a real character.

The Women of Wigal Valley

2009-11-05T06:45:00.004-05:00

"The women of Wigal Valley are very beautiful, just like you."

About a week ago the PRT dropped some humanitarian aid (HA) off in the Wigal Valley. The HA was for the women, mostly widows, who make a living by carrying bags of cement up a mountain side. They are very poor and have many children to look after. So, the PRT gave them winter clothing and pots and pans. The women were very hardened and did not want us taking pictures of them. The mission was successful and I made some friends along the way.

Cutest Child Ever?

2009-11-01T07:47:00.005-05:00

Is this the cutest child ever, or what?

Farewell

2009-10-28T09:36:00.002-04:00

Today we had a farewell party for one of our local national engineers. He found a higher paying job in Kabul and we are very proud of him. He's been with the PRT for a year and a half and has done a great job. Unfortunately, the PRT does not pay enough money compared to some of the NGOs, so our engineers often leave for a better pay check. We had a very nice luncheon and I wore a kuchi dress--a typical pattern for the nomadic people in Afghanistan.

Good Morning Afghanistan

2009-10-19T02:21:00.002-04:00

A couple weeks ago the news team from Good Morning America made a visit to the PRT. I got to spend a lot of time with Chris Cuomo and the crew as we took them to several of our project sites. I did some interviews, but it looks like they never made it on the air. So, here are the links to some pictures:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/war-afghanistan-scenes-battle/Story?id=8768136&page=2

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Afghanistan/rebuilding-afghanistan-war/Story?id=8778096&page=2

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Afghanistan/rebuilding-afghanistan-war/story?id=8778096

The last link has a video and I'm in there a a couple times, although a little bit out of context. I think the backhoe on one of my projects got more air time than I did.

Insomnia

2009-09-24T14:45:00.004-04:00

Tonight, for the first time in a long time, I cannot sleep. A lot of thoughts are swirling in my head, so the blog is my outlet.

I think many people have forgotten why we invaded Afghanistan. And I also think many people think that Al-Qaeda and Taliban are synonyms.

I try to see the positive aspects in life, but I'm afraid that I can longer see that in Afghanistan. The lack of direction, guidance and strategy is frustrating...to say the least. The newness haze of my situation has warn off and I'm staring the truth in the eyes. What we're doing here is not an effective counter-insurgency strategy and no one knows how to make it right. And we will probably never get it right.

The past several weeks have been hard. Our R&R program was canceled without reason. Leave is not available to everyone in the unit. And the shop has been busy. We had a flash flood destroy a critical bridge on one of the highways and we had to find a solution. We also had twenty new projects to award...and that meant reviewing 450 proposals, selecting a winning contractor and signing the contract. In 12 days. We can build all these schools, but are they, alone, really defeating the insurgency? When we visit a school that the PRT built five years ago and it's had no maintenance since, tell me what I should think about the 20 school projects we currently have under construction. Governance has not caught up to development.

I love the quote, "Where the road ends, the insurgency begins." I believe in it 100%. Why else would the Taliban have attacked our road projects over a dozen times in the past three months? Why else would they intimate the construction workers and contractors? Why else would they kill effective village elders who support the road? It's because the project is effective to their demise. But will the PRT be building any more roads in the near future? The answer is no. I've been told by higher headquarters that it's not the PRT's job and that we need to focus on small scale projects. I've been told by an aeronautical engineer that the PRT does not have the expertise to build roads, but his organization does. How many civil engineers does it take to convince people that we have the expertise, experience and capability to build excellent quality roads? Because I have 10 and we have the roads as our proof!

Unfortunately I feel that I am at the end of my rope. This PRT experience has been so disappointing that the only way I can cope is to stop caring and continue to count down the days (184). And we don't have the best team one could wish for, which amplifies the disappointment. I'm ready to move to Switzerland and just forget.........Afghanistan what? Where's that? And civilian clothes look better and better as I'm on my 186th straight day of choosing between the green outfit or the blue outfit. I wish Scott and I were on the same page, like we usually are. But when it comes to this issue, I'm afraid that we are reading different books. Hence, the source of my insomnia.

Rain

2009-08-31T10:13:00.002-04:00

Last night it rained for the first time since I've been in Afghanistan. And rain it did. The wind, thunder and lightening woke me up at 3am and kept me up all morning. After it stopped, I could not go back to sleep.

When we reported to work, we found out all the damage that occurred. There was pretty much a flash flood across the entire province. Lots of people dead. Lots of damage. Right now I'm working on a critical bridge that was washed out. Completely gone. It was made out of concrete and there was no water flowing underneath the bridge until this morning. Insane.

Ramadan

2009-08-30T10:29:00.002-04:00

The election is over and hopefully there won't be a run off. :) Now we're in the season of Ramadan. It's a very spiritual time for Muslims and to be in a Muslim country during Ramadan is a neat experience. Afghans only eat and drink right before sunrise and after sunset. During the day, they fast from food and water. Construction continues, but the contractor will adjust the hours. You can tell the fasting takes a toll on them. I think the hardest part would be fasting from water, because it is over 100 degrees.

Independence Day

2009-08-19T00:58:00.002-04:00

Today in Afghanistan is Independence Day. Not independence from the Taliban, the Russians or the mujaheddin. Independence from Britain. This day dates back to 1919, when the British finally left Afghanistan. Usually the Afghans will celebrate, but this year since it is so close to the elections, there is not much celebrating. Everyone is pretty tense about pre-election violence. The turnout, compared to 2004, is expected to be huge. I guess we will just have to wait and see what happens.

In other news, the weather has started to cool down a bit. Yesterday evening it was 92 degrees and it felt very comfortable. I'm going to go back to England and freeze my butt off!

Sitting Duck

2009-08-16T10:33:00.008-04:00

On my latest mission I went a little picture crazy. We had quite an ambitious day planned. We were going to check up on four of our road projects, plus have a meeting with some village elders. We didn't accomplish everything we wanted to do, but we still got a lot done and validated an important project. We went to the district of Deh Bala, which is in the southern part of Nangarhar. It was so beautiful out there and I instantly thought that I wouldn't mind living here. The road project is doing well. Some pictures are below. These guys get paid $4 a day.

The Engineering team with one of our contractors.

This guy is building a wall and asked for some cement from the PRT.

Talking on the cell amongst the goats.

On our way to the second road project, one of our MRAPs got stuck in the soft mud. So we backed up a second MRAP to pull it out and the first MRAP only got more stuck and the secon MRAP became stuck. So we backed up a third MRAP and that got stuck too. We were stuck until the bulldozer from the construction site came and pulled out us out. By the time this happened, it was dark outside, and anyone who knows anything about Afghanistan knows you don't want to be outside when it's dark. The villagers where we got stuck were very friendly (one even helped us dig out the MRAP) and said they kicked the Taliban out. The police there said they've taken fire from the surrounding mountains. We were only 20km from the Pakistan border. It's a good story and our MRAPs were going to get stuck sooner or later. I'm just glad we didn't have to spend the night out there.
Our salvation!!

Dari Noor

2009-08-15T10:28:00.002-04:00

A little while ago we took a trip to Dari Noor, the most northern part of Nangarhar. The people there are not Pashtun, they are Pashai and they take care of their own. It is one of the safest areas in Nangarhar and it is extremely beautiful. Life up there seems simple and uncomplicated. The people are friendly but reserved. I hope you can feel like you were there from the pictures.

Ladies Night

2009-08-14T01:33:00.007-04:00

Wednesday night is ladies night in Jalalabad. We wouldn't have it any other way. So the ladies of the PRT got out and mingled with the ladies of Afghanistan. Some of them spoke English, but since there was no translator with me I was stuck with my three phrases of Pashto and my camera. The children were very receptive, crowded around us and gave us flowers and food. It was very tiring and of course it was hot outside. The kids here are adorable but all of them are attention starved and the Americans are the show in town whenever we roll up.

The Khyber Pass

2009-08-10T05:33:00.002-04:00

A couple weeks ago we went to Torkham Gate, Afghanistan's second largest border crossing. This border crossing area is the backside of the Khyber Pass, which has a long and infamous history. I must admit that it was pretty cool to be walking on the same ground as Alexander the Great and Genghis Khan.

There was a purpose to our trip. We have a project there--a footbridge to alleviate some of the traffic through the border crossing area. The border crossing is extremely busy, with lots of people and trucks coming and going. Work is progressing well, but I think every one was more interested in getting pictures taken at the Afghan-Pak border. We technically stepped a foot or two inside Pakistan, but don't tell anyone! While I was there on the border area, I received a marriage proposal from one of the Afghan Border Police. He has his arm around me in one of the pictures below.

The Engineers

2009-08-09T09:14:00.003-04:00

A couple weeks ago we had a "green bean" BBQ with our Afghan engineers. JB, one of our civilians, has the connections with KBR and got us some juicy steaks and vegetables on the grill. A couple of our engineers did not eat the beef because they will only eat the meat if they personally know the butcher. But we still had fun and got to know each other better. They are good guys and know their stuff when it comes to construction. JB cooking us some juicy steaks

The engineering crew

Hugs at the ECP

2009-08-04T07:14:00.002-04:00

I'm several days behind in my posts. Work is very busy and I have to wait in line to use the internet, so please be patient. I have a feeling I will never get caught up.

Several days ago I had to pick some paperwork up at the entry control point (ECP) on the base. Many children hang around the ECP and a little Pashto goes a long way. As I approached a group of about ten boys I started speaking to them in Pashto. When it was time for me to leave, one little boy asked me for a hug. After I gave him a hug, a lined formed and all these little boys wanted hugs! I hugged about eight of them and at least one of them twice. It was adorable! As I was walking away, they said they loved me. And I told them I love them too. Their response was they love me three and four and five.

Afghanistan from the Air Part II

2009-07-28T10:01:00.015-04:00

I've only been in Afghanistan for less than a month, but I've already been on two helicopters! Today I was treated to a two hour Black Hawk ride over southern Nangarhar and the Spin Ghar foothills. We looked at a dam the PRT built two years ago and at future development sites. I was the only passenger in the helo who got to wear the headset and I told the pilots where to fly so we could get a good look. It was awesome! But honestly I was not too concerned with work. The scenery took my breath away! I think the pictures will speak for themselves.

Six Percent Complete

2009-07-20T11:27:00.006-04:00

I know it's a terrible thing, but I am already starting to countdown how many days I have left. It's not that I don't like being in Afghanistan--I really do. And if I wasn't married to the best man in the world I would probably stay here as long as I could. I really believe in what we are doing and that we are making a difference. Unfortunately the media does not report all the good things that are happening here. True, there still are bad guys out there intimidating the population, but there is resistance and reconstruction.

I've added some more pictures. A couple days ago we went to one of the more dangerous parts of our province and were met by children in the street waving at us and giving us the thumbs up sign. It was a good feeling.

We were also fortunate enough to be invited by the Jalalabad Mayor to his compound for dinner. The Afghans treat their guests very well and I received a beautiful purple dress and green head scarf. The Mayor also presented a beautiful dinner with enough food to feed a village. I tried goat for the first time and it was wonderful!

On the roof of the Jalalabad Mayor's guest house

I think this picture is pretty self explanatory

The guest house grounds at night; it's a big deal to have electricity in Afghanistan

The spread for dinner

Me in an MRAP during one of our missions

My First Letter

2009-07-15T22:33:00.006-04:00

Yesterday I received my first letter in the mail from Aunt Margie! Thank you very much, I really enjoyed the picture and I will hang it in my office. I also appreciate all the comments on the blog. I'm glad people enjoy reading it and sharing my experiences. A lot of people have also been asking what they can send me in a care package. I am compiling a list and I will send it soon.

A couple days ago we attended a ribbon cutting for newly paved streets in Jalalabad. It was an interesting event, but the best part was talking to the little kids in Pashto. A little goes a long way and I'm excited to learn more. The only thing about little kids in Afghanistan is that they all want attention and if you're talking to one or two kids the next thing you know you are surrounded!

This little boy wanted a picture of the two of us and held my hand!

This is a picture of some of the kids who surrounded me, I couldn't fit all of them in the photo

Here's a picture of our security forces (SECFOR) after the ceremony with some "flair"

This is one of the footbridges under construction; holding up form work with sticks is very common in Afghanistan

Jalalabad

2009-07-11T22:01:00.007-04:00

Yesterday I went out on my first mission. We went to Jalalabad, the capital of Nangarhar province. We looked at four different construction sites: justice complex, civil service commissioning training center, girls school and pediatric wing. It was so much fun! I was very nervous about going outside of the wire, but by the second site visit I stopped being afraid because I know this is where I am supposed to be. Going out in Afghanistan is like taking a step back in time. As soon as we rolled outside the gate there were all these little kids and tons of animals! Goats, chickens, ducks, cows, sheep. The children are adorable. Wherever we went a crowd would gather and the children would cheer and give us the thumbs up sign.

Pictures of the justice complex

The first site visit was to the justice complex and as we were walking out two older women in head scarfs came out of nowhere and walked up to us. Lisa (the girl I'm replacing) and I talked to them and they told us that they want to be soldiers and do what we do. They even said they were strong enough to wear our body armor.

At the girls school we met the principal, who is also a woman. She was very kind and appreciates the school we are funding. We took a picture with her and all the teachers before we left and I am promised to come back and have chai with her.Working on the black board and meeting the principal and teachers for the girls school

Next stop was the hospital where we are funding a hundred bed pediatric wing to the main hospital in Jalalabad. I inspected some form work and got to meet some of the children.
Lastly we went to Duranta Dam, which was built by the Russians. Our guys got some time with the crew served weapons while we chased away little kids who kept on creeping closer and closer to us.It was an amazing day and I was wiped out when we returned. The hot weather doesn't help at all but I can't wait to go out again. Today I have meetings all day long with contractors. Should be fun!

Old Pictures

2009-07-08T22:11:00.003-04:00

Here are some of the pictures I promised from our journey to Afghanistan!We flew via World Air from Indianapolis to Manas Air Base. We stopped in Germany to refuel and get beer. It was my last drink for several months, so I didn't mind drinking at 4am. We were allowed to take guns on the plane, so that was pretty cool.This was my living accommodations at Manas. There's a big tent for all the transients, but there weren't too many females in there. It was a little eerie at times to see this big ocean of unoccupied beds.This is me after we loaded all our bags onto the pallet for our flight to Bagram.This is a picture of the load yard. It doesn't even include all the bags on our flight. The load yard was a busy place!Here's a picture of me and our senior medic on the C-17 to Bagram.
And this is the inside of the C-17. It was strange not being able to see outside of the plane. I got to sit in the jump seats, which looked a lot more comfortable than the seats in the middle.

Right now at the FOB we are doing turn over and it's going well. There's really nothing too exciting to talk about. I will take lots of pictures of the FOB and post them on the site soon. I will also be heading out on my first mission soon, so I will let everyone know how that goes.

Afghanistan from the Air Part I

2009-07-06T11:23:00.005-04:00

Today I arrived at my new home for the next nine months. We took a chinook from Bagram to FOB Finley Shields. I sat right next to the gunner and got a great view of Afghanistan. The below picture is what most of Afghanistan looks like.Now this is what Nangarhar province looks like! We live in a fertile valley and there's lots of greenery, which is really nice. It's also hot. Today was 115 and it gets as high as 140.Here's a picture of me on the chinook.
And here's a picture of my current living arrangements. This is only temporary until I move into the hotel (old Russian R&R complex) which is actually very nice for deployment standards.Even though I'm excited to be here and excited to start work, it was hard to leave Scott, who is still stuck at Bagram. We may be able to see each other at Bagram in a month or so for a conference, but we're not holding our breath.
I have more pictures to share from our flights to Kyrgyzstan, but it will have to wait for now. It's almost my bed time! :)

Afghanistan

2009-07-03T01:02:00.001-04:00

I finally made it to Afghanistan! The flight was not too bad. We stopped in Germany for an 90 minutes then we landed at Manas Air Force Base in Kyrgyzstan. I really like Manas! It's small and quiet. I stayed there for two days and then took a C-17 to Bagram Air Field in Afghanistan. I arrived last night and I'm trying to get my bearings. Bagram is huge and we are staying on the other side of base, in what looks like a refuge camp. It's very wind, dusty and dry here. I should be heading out to FOB Finley Shields soon. I am excited to leave Bagram and set-up my new home. I have a lot of pictures to share and I will post them as soon as I can.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

2009-06-28T19:40:00.003-04:00

Very soon I will be leaving for Afghanistan! I am honestly excited. I think it will be a great adventure and I'll get an opportunity to work on some really cool projects. I'm also happy that I will no longer be a member of the 5% of the Air Force who hasn't deployed. And what a deployment I'm on...running combat missions outside the wire instead of typical Air Force deployments (relaxing by a pool or going horseback riding). It's never easy being away from Scott and saying goodbye to him only gets harder (Scott has already departed). This time is different with the added stress that we'll both be in a dangerous part of the world. I know the time in country will go by fast as I'll be working a lot! The guys on my team are great and I realized today that I missed them on leave. They can make me laugh and that is a great distration! But I must admit that I am already looking forward to coming home and being with family and friends again.

Hobos, Homos and Just Plain Crazy People

2009-06-26T18:47:00.006-04:00

Scott and I returned to Camp Atterbury yesterday after a very relaxing vacation in beautiful, sunny San Francisco. I must admit the city was a culture shock. After being in a monochromatic society 27/4 for three months, we were immediately injected into a rainbow society. It took some getting used to. Scott and I have never paid the homeless for directions before, but we did it twice in two days. They certainly know their way around the city! We also did a lot of walking. We walked from one end of the peninsula to the other and then some in just one day. The weather was perfect although I did get a nasty sunburn on my neck. We also ate our way through the city! Sourdough, sushi, $30 breakfasts and juicy steaks. At least we know how to live it up! We will have nine months to rough it.

The atrium of our hotel. I've never felt under dressed for breakfast before.

Scott and I celebrating our third wedding anniversary--together for the first time!

Here are some pictures from our bus trip around the city. We rode on the top of an open roof double decker bus across the Golden Gate Bridge.

MRX - Done!

2009-06-14T06:05:00.004-04:00

Today is the last day of our MRX! I was on two missions, one to a shura (meeting) and one to a provincial development council (PDC). The shura is pictured below. I'm in the middle with my black head scarf. On the way to the PDC, we received an exercise inject that our driver was injured and we had to practice our down driver drill. Since I was the only person in the back seat, I got to jump into the gun turret! I was behind a 240, but I didn't get to fire any rounds. It was pretty cool.

Since we are almost done with training (three days and a wake-up!) Scott and I are getting ready for San Francisco. We have reservations for a well deserved massage and are looking forward to exploring the city. If anyone has any suggestions on where to go, let me know!

Making History

2009-06-09T18:17:00.002-04:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090609/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_us_afghanistan

We'll be there making it happen!!

Things I Won't Miss

2009-06-09T15:26:00.003-04:00

As the countdown continues, I've made a list of all the things I won't miss about Camp Atterbury. In no particular order...

- Skunks and the smell of skunks
- Styrofoam plates and cups and plastic utensils for eating
- MREs for lunch...every day
- Patience training (because the 189th doesn't train boredom)
- Personal humiliation and degradation (broad category, includes many things)
- Mud
- Walking on packing crates
- FEMA trailers
- Porta-potties (by now I'd rather use a tree)
- Death by powerpoint (it's nice to know some things are the same in every service)

The Clique

2009-06-08T20:04:00.003-04:00

Some of the officers on the staff have started to form a good friendship. This is a picture of us. It's not a very good pic, but I like it. The other member of our clique is the doctor, or "Doc". He's taking the picture.

Here's another pic from our PRT picnic. We're such dorks!

MRX Planning

2009-06-08T17:00:00.002-04:00

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! We are nine days and a wake-up away from getting out of Camp Atterbury. I've never wanted to go to a third world country so bad! We finished our civilian-military training. There was a lot of good material, but it was death by powerpoint. The best briefing was by a gentleman, John, who went to Helmand province with the UK. He's actually from Scotland and Scott and I got a chance to talk to him. When Scott and I return from Afghanistan we'll get in touch with John and give a presentation to the UK forces preparing to deploy to Afghanistan.

We are now focusing on our final exercise. The first three missions are all engineer related, so we are pretty busy. It should be an okay time. Very different from Air Force exercises and it's a nice change of pace.

In other related news, all Air Force civil engineers except for fire fighters are now on a 1:1 dwell. That means six months deployed, six months home. Apparently taskings under this new schedule have already started to come down. It's very possible Scott and I could know about our next deployment before we return.

Introducing Capt Scott Wilcox

2009-06-05T10:02:00.004-04:00

Yesterday Scott officially became a Captain! I am so proud of him and his promotion ceremony was extremely memorable. Scott's been waiting for this for a long time and he's more than ready to be a Captain. Most of my good ideas come from him anyway. I am so happy I was there and able to pin him on. We've missed birthdays, anniversaries and holidays, but we've never missed a promotion.
Scott's birthday was yesterday and I think he had a good birthday considering he couldn't leave the post and couldn't drink alcohol. He received a lot of nice gifts and his PRT even had a pool party that day.

Going back in time a little, our STX was pretty good. I got to go out on a mission and we got attacked. The shortest person on our security forces team threw me to the ground and I got a huge bruise on my arm. It was awesome! They told me to stay put and not shoot back, which is actually a shame as I could have killed 'em all! We took a casualty with a gun shot wound to the leg. We transported him back to the base and doc was there waiting to patch him back up.
We are currently in the middle of civilian-military training. The training has useful info, but it's painfully boring. Luckily we are taking some time off from training to recharge our batteries before our final exercise, the mission readiness exercise (MRX). Only 12 days and a wake-up until we're outta here!

Fallen Zoomie

2009-05-31T10:49:00.001-04:00

Things are heating up in Afghanistan, like they normally do during the summer months. Recently first female USAFA grad was killed in Afghanistan by an IED. She graduated in 2006.

http://www.gazette.com/articles/air-54576-academy-force.html

Today we are in the middle of another exercise. I'm out on a mission today to evaluate a project site. I will post some pictures if anything interesting happens.

Tomorrow evening Scott will pin on Captain! I'm so excited and happy for him. He is more than ready and will do a great job.

Fun with CLS

2009-05-29T15:11:00.003-04:00

Yesterday we finished combat lifesaver (CLS) class. It was really good information on how to save our buddies in the field if something bad should happen to them. As you can see from the pictures below, we had a lot of fun with the class.

Yes, he's using a knife to stabilize a fracture.

We have also integrated with our civilians on the team. We have two USAID reps and one state department rep. They have unbelievable backgrounds and are interesting to talk to.

Below is a picture of me on a mine resistant anti0ambush (MRAP) vehicle. We will have these in country and they are good stuff!

The Army Trains, the Air Force Teaches

2009-05-27T21:36:00.004-04:00

So the past several days have been busy. We've been playing with crew served weapons and doing convoy training. We weren't able to use live rounds during the convoy as a result of the below picture. It's a shame that the first time will be in country. In the above picture Adam, our intel officer, puts together a 240B heavy machine gun.

In this picture, our PRT doctor takes some much needed rest from training.

Today we've been working on our combat lifesaver (CLS) certification. It's mostly care under fire and tactical field care...applying a tourniquet, opening an airway and bandaging a sucking chest wound. I put an IV in Melissa, but it took me two tries. Afterwards, she tried to put an IV in me, but went through my vein (I did the same thing to her, so it's only fair). And then my veins were declared unusable by the instructor and she put an IV in someone else. I will post pictures soon!

Tomorrow is our last day of CLS and then we'll be doing land navigation. It's hard to believe that we only have three weeks left in our training.

Stress Shoot

2009-05-23T16:05:00.002-04:00

We just finished our stress shoot today. It was hot, humid and there was little cloud cover. We had to run around and low crawl with our body armor on and after we were hot, sweaty and breathing hard we had to shoot. We shot 40 rounds from different positions and and only 11 of my rounds hit the target. But from what the instructor said, anything over 10 is "expert". I'm spent! I lost my voice and an hour later my heart beat is still not back to normal. It was fun though.

This evening we have a BBQ with the PRT, which is excellent. We need down time together to socialize. I just wish I could have a cold beer!

Drama

2009-05-21T18:57:00.002-04:00

It seems like our PRT is falling apart. Aunt Margie commented that she wonders what will happen next and I'm right there with her wondering. The staff can't get along with each other and we've had some major blow-ups at each other. On top of that, our security forces element may lose some key leaders of the team to injuries that would render us non-mission capable. The leadership is working hard to resolve these issues, it just doesn't seem like other PRTs have the issues we have. Sure, the other PRTs have things they need to work through, but their problems are not as severe.

I Want My Desk Back

2009-05-16T15:48:00.002-04:00

Yesterday was a hard day of training. After running through tick infested woods and throwing myself down on the ground in mud, water and allergy-inducing grass I had just about enough. I miss my desk! I miss receiving classroom instruction indoors. JLo asked me how I like the "grunt world." Yesterday was my breaking point. But today things were better. We did some classroom instruction on convoys and then tomorrow we'll be actually rolling out in the vehicles.

We also did HUMVEE rollover training. I was not able to participate because of my neck injury. It looked like fun though. Scott was really worried about me going through the training, so I know that made him happy.

The Other Side of Camp Atterbury

2009-05-14T18:04:00.004-04:00

The past several days have been very busy. We learned essential Army tasks like setting up a Claymore mine and throwing hand grenades. The Army guys couldn't believe that we've never touched or heard of Claymore mines before. Throwing hand grenades was fun, but anti climatic since they were duds.

Then we went to the field. It was not the Army's version of the "field" from what I've been told. We lived in tents but they were nice and all our amenities were nice too. We had great training out there! We manned the entry control point (ECP) to the contingency operation location (COL) and I got to search all the females coming on post. We also learned how to clear a room and building, which is fun in training and terrifying in real life. We also learned about improvised explosive devices (IEDs) and drove an IED lane where we were trying to spot them. We did pretty well but I got blown up by one on a foot patrol.

Now I am back at Camp Atterbury proper. Scott and I were in the field at the same time, so we got to see each other. He'll be back tomorrow night. Our dates for leave at the end of the training have been confirmed and we are spending it in San Francisco. We even get to celebrate our anniversary together while we are there!

Life in the TOC

2009-05-08T20:59:00.003-04:00

Yesterday we finished a three day Command Post Exercise (CPX). All of our time was spend in the tactical operations center (TOC). It's the "brain" of our PRT. The engineer function doesn't have too much to contribute in planning the missions outside the wire, but nevertheless mission planning is an interesting process to watch and partake in. This morning we completed a five mile road march in the rain. It wasn't too bad, but I'm not looking forward to our seven mile road march, whenever that may be.

Soon we will be "going to the field" as the Army likes to call it. I call it camping on crack. We'll be living at a make shift forward operating base (FOB) for five days where we'll have to respond to different scenarios. It sounds like fun. I'm just exausted and need more sleep. That's probably the hardest part about CST. I'm used to going to bed whenever I want (sometimes 8pm) and here it's hard to stay awake.

All's Well that Ends Well

2009-05-04T09:55:00.003-04:00

The past several days have been busy. We started qualification for our weapons. We qualified on the 9MM and M4. The 9MM was a lot of fun. The Army uses pop up targets and when you successfully shoot the target, it falls down. The below picture shows a guy shooting a pop-up target.

The M4 qualification was disastrous. There were too many people trying to use the range and there was a huge back-up. I tried to qualifying three times before I actually made it because I was either shooting at the wrong targets or my weapon malfunctioned because I put it together incorrectly. At least I know I'll never make that mistake again! When I finally qualified, I ended up shooting expert (36 out of 40 targets hit) but I was exhausted at the end of the day. We also had to fire in our gas mask and at night (limited visibility). It was fun, but let's just say I'm glad we have the day off!

I managed to get a warrior picture of myself wearing all my gear. An extra 55 pounds of "stuff" that may save my life one day.

Three Bad Haircuts

2009-04-28T18:06:00.003-04:00

Yesterday Scott received three bad haircuts and the end product is below. Now we both look like little basic cadets (doolies). The picture was taken before our nightly walk. Every night we try to get together at 9pm to walk around the base (or post, as the Army likes to call it) for some alone time. The last couple of nights have been beautiful and last night we got a great view of two helicopters practicing medical evacuations.

Today was our last day of combatives class. We fought three, three minute rounds and I got beat up. I hyperextended my arm a little bit because I was caught in a straight armbar and didn't want to tap out. I was able to get out of it, but my arm's a little sore. In the below picture we're practicing throws and it was my turn to hit the mat.We also finished our radio training today. It was pretty dry, but now I can program three different kinds of radios. Tomorrow we're supposed to have most of the day off, so I'm going to get all my gear and weapons in order. It's hard to believe how much stuff we've been issued since starting this process.

Lazy Sunday

2009-04-26T13:33:00.003-04:00

We didn't drive around in the humvees with the live BLF today. So we got out early from class and it turned out to be an easy day. We still did combatives in the morning and we learned new chokes. We have two more days of combatives before we're done. Tomorrow I have a communications class which will be interesting with a little luck. I will try to post some more pictures soon.

Choke Your Boss Day

2009-04-25T15:09:00.002-04:00

It's not everyday you get to choke your boss. Today we had a two hour combatives class that started at 0500. It was very similar to the training I had at USAFA, so it was a lot of fun and I was ahead of the power curve. I was partenered with my boss and I got to choke her and put her in an arm bar. One of the guys in our class volunteered to be choked to sleep and it was weird to see him flop around on the floor. At the end of the class we did three, two minute sparing sessions. It was stran ge to do that with guys, but I think I suprised all of them. I even got two of the three to tap out with a choke (my personal favorite).

After class we did training on the Blue Force Tracker (BFT). It's a computer system that works off of GPS and displays friendly and enemy forces on the battlefield. We'll be using it when we roll outside the wire. Tomorrow we will roll out in humvees and play with a live system. I will post pictures!

Yesterday we were issued weapons and magazines. So my new best friend for the next 11 months is my M-4 and 9MM. I haven't named them yet.

Scott is doing well. He went on a five mile road march yesterday and he said it went well. We usually get to see each other a couple times a day, which is nice.

Our First Foot Movement

2009-04-24T10:02:00.003-04:00

Yesterday we had our first foot movement. Two and a half mile march in 38 minutes with all our gear and helmet on. It was actually pretty fun and I only got a couple small blisters with my three week old boots. When we arrived at our destination, we got to shoot 9MM and M4 simulators. We used real weapons that were hooked to to a big computer game and fired lasers at targets on a big screen. It was a lot of fun and I shot really well with the 9MM. The M4 was very difficult because we had our gear and helmet on and we are not used to shooting with that stuff.
The 9MM is above and the M4 is below.

Culture Clash

2009-04-22T17:37:00.003-04:00

Everything has been going well at Camp Atterbury. We were issued a lot of our gear yesterday. Each person got around $6,000 in equipment...cold weather gear that can take you to -60 degrees Fahrenheit, modular sleeping bag, flak vest with plates, ruck sacks and four sets of Army Combat Uniforms (ACUs). We can only wear the Army uniforms when we go outside the wire in Afghanistan. Too bad because they are really nice! Below is my Civil Engineer (CE) Non-commissioned Officer (NCO) getting fitted for his flak vest.
Scott and I ran into each other during the equipment issue. We filled up three of those green bags with all our new gear.

Here's a picture of our Provincial Reconstruction Team (PRT) marching down the road. They march everywhere, but officers don't have to be in the formation! The Army and the Air Force culture is very different and creating some tension. It seems like we do everything at different ends of the spectrum and everyone is frustrated (except for me, I find it amusing). Hopefully things will settle down soon.

I've been talking with the Capt I'm going to replace in Afghanistan. It seems like I will be very busy once I get in country. There are currently 52 active construction projects worth $72 million. If that's not impressive, there are 79 planned projects worth $112 million. I will be super busy! And there are some cool projects I'll be working/planning, like building an airport! Cool!

Sixty-four Females and Eight Showers

2009-04-18T18:46:00.002-04:00

No, that's not the title of the latest porno flick, it's the living situation for the next two months. Sixty-four females with eight showers, eight bathrooms and seven sinks. Did I mention that EVERYONE has PT at 0500 and hygiene/breakfast time from 0600-0800? It's going to be a long two months...

Rubber Glove for Lunch?

2009-04-15T20:10:00.004-04:00

The chow hall (dining facility) on base serves edible food. It's nothing to write home about, but the have a nice salad bar that makes up for the mystery meat. Today for lunch they were serving a Caesar salad with grilled chicken. After Scott took a couple bites into his salad, he discovered a latex glove in his salad. All the employees are required to serve wearing these rubber gloves and one must have fallen off and into the salad. Apparently it was never noticed. After the incident was reported, it seemed like everyone on base came up to Scott and offered him apologies. It was pretty gross.

Tell an Afghan, Tell the World

2009-04-13T14:18:00.003-04:00

The past week has been pretty depressing. After receiving briefing after briefing from academics about how we are losing the war in Afghanistan and all the things the Americans are doing wrong, it is difficult to understand why I'm putting myself in harms way. If we are to do this country justice, we will be there for at least twenty years (I increased my earlier estimate of ten years after hearing from all these PhD's). Then yesterday we received a classified briefing on all the ways we can get blown up or killed while we're over there. Fun stuff.

Today we started our training by the Army Corps of Engineers Afghanistan District. Four construction quality assurance personnel who spent at least 13 months in Afghanistan taught us about the experience and challenges we will deal with while we're there. It actually sounds like a lot of fun and we'll get to do a lot of outside the box thinking. They told us the living conditions in Afghanistan is circa the 11th century, so the designs/construction methods we use have to be sustainable by the locals. And then in their next statement to us, they say "build lots of solar panels and wind farms." But that's a completely different topic that I won't get into right now. Needless to say, none of my buildings will have solar panels.

I wanted to thank everyone for their comments and support. It's great to know people are finding my blog useful and a somewhat interesting read. :) Scott and I are escaping the base today for some good ol' fashioned fun at Walmart.

Graduation Day

2009-04-09T14:24:00.007-04:00

Yesterday was our graduation from the Pashto language class. I enjoyed learning the language and the culture, even if it was intense. The language sounds like Russian and a little like Spanish and has some cool sounding words. We completed 56 hours of instruction in seven days, so I will have to work hard to keep my proficiency. Below is a picture of me receiving my "diploma" from my instructor, Zalmai. Zalmai is a great teacher and moved to America from Afghanistan in 2003. He shared many stories from his childhood in Afghanistan and they were fascinating.
After graduation our class escaped from base and went to a traditional Afghan restaurant in Bloomington called Samira's. The food was amazing! I am looking forward to good eating once we're in country. For dinner I had manto, which is a thin dumpling filled with shredded beef and onions, topped with a yogurt sauce. It was delicious!

Miss New York

2009-04-04T20:11:00.004-04:00

The Army is considered to a "macho" and "hooah" branch of the military, am I right? Then why on earth do they require their soldiers to wear their reflective belts like sashes? Navy (including Marines) and Air Force personnel must wear their reflective belts around their waist. But not here on Camp Atterbury. We must follow every Army rule.

Taking Sips from a Fire Hydrant

2009-04-03T19:25:00.003-04:00

The first part of our pre-deployment training is a cultural and language training class. For eight hours a day we learn how to speak Phasto, the native language where we will be going in Afghanistan. It is very exhausting and by the end of the first hour my brain is fried. At the end of the day, I can't remember a single thing I've learned, forcing me to study when I get back to my dorm (which is pictured below). After the language training, we have an hour and a half lecture on various topics about Afghanistan. I haven't been impressed thus far.

The barracks have four wings with bathrooms/showers in the middle. We only have five females right now since only a small group are here for the language and cultural training. We should have more females trickle in over the next week and then we should be full when the regular combat skills training (CST) kicks off at the end of the month.

My humble bed below. The Air Force knows how to do quality of life, but the Army...not so much.

We're in the Army Now

2009-04-01T19:00:00.004-04:00

Life in the Army is very different! Camp Atterbury is considered to be a forward operating base, so it's like we are already deployed. We are not allowed to have any fun (drink alcohol, wear civilian clothes, possess pornography, leave the base, drive or ride in a personally owned vehicle). The Army also does a lot of waiting around. We were told to be at Camp Atterbury on 31 March when our class doesn't start until 2 April. Today Scott and I tasted Army food at the chow hall, used the computers at the USO and worked out at the gym, which is actually pretty nice. Scott and I are not allowed to visit each other's barracks, so...

Tomorrow our cultural and language class starts. I will write more about that later and post some pictures of my barracks.

In Indy

2009-03-31T18:56:00.002-04:00

Scott and I made to to Indianapolis! We are in the USO awaiting transportation to Camp Atterbury. The last real food I had were some Girl Scout cookies--Samoas, mmmm.......

The Family I Chose

2009-03-29T20:35:00.015-04:00

Today we had a wonderful BBQ with family and friends at the Sielski household. Wendel's chicken...Polish sausage from Redlinski's...crown jewel made by Aunt Kathy...cheese from Amsterdam...beer from Germany.

We also tied two yellow ribbons around two trees--one for Scott and one for me.

Testing, Testing...

2009-03-28T21:49:00.001-04:00

This is my first blog entry. Isn't "blog" a strange word?